I was just about to walk out of the ladies restrooms when I saw her face. She normally smiles, not big smiles that beam with a heart full of joy but a smile that says she is glad to see you. She’s a landed immigrant who battles out day after day to feed herself as she lives on a minimal wage and works long exhaustive hours. She’s the janitor who carries around disinfectant, a cloth and many burdens. Our conversations by the lockers or in her little storage room suggests that life overwhelms her rather than fills her soul with pleasure. I don’t know her name, yet I can tell you that she struggles with carpal tunnel that requires surgery, she fell in love and married her dream man late in life and she has had to go without her insulin because she hasn’t had the funds to fulfill her prescription. Our conversations rich but sometimes hard as she has broken English.
I looked into her brown eyes and asked the question that was begging. “Are you ok?”
She burst into tears as we made our way to the storage room. She spoke of the fine that she had just received from the police on her way to work and how in the world is she going to pay this and cover rent?
I felt the Spirit whirl and rise in me but my heart was resistant. Was He really asking me to cover her rent? Surely not! I tried to come up with solutions and remedies to have the situation sorted out. Yet how was it going to be completely resolved if God was asking me to act, to play my part and I was hiding behind excuses. Aren’t I about to go to Disneyworld for a holiday? Surely God would want me to save my money in order to bless our children and have a good time.
I cuddled her and walked away from the conversation with a heavy heart, burdened, because fulfilling His Heavenly directions seemed hard and selfless. I was looking at self rather than up.
I tried to run it out on the treadmill. Looking at my time, creating an even running pace and engage in a conversation with my Irish friend.
Eventually she walked past me, cloth in hand and eyes puffy from our chat. God rose and whispered to my heart again. A decision in that moment was to be made. Obedience or rebellion?
I called her over and asked another question. We engaged in another conversation and I stopped running. Running from excuses and walked boldly into conviction.
I am a servant girl who knows too well that loving Christ comes with a beautiful sacrifice. Yet perspective says that a months worth of rent is insignificant when I truly look down the lens to the blessings I’ve received.
Was I not just sharing a day with my friend Ann Voskamp who said “She who is blessed much, gives much.”
The Lord spoke to me as Ann humbly shared that she had given all her royalties from her book “One Thousand Gifts” to the Third world.
It stuck with me…She didn’t give 10% or half but all of it. Her generous spirit creating a chain reaction in this girl sitting beside her Sunday morning. Where we held hands during prayer, heads bowed thanking God for His goodness.
Goodness shouldn’t have a blanket around it but rather be unveiled in its beauty for the world to see.
Our actions when glorifying Christ is goodness.
God’s gifts shouldn’t just be a lip service of praise but a projection to act.
In acting His glory is shown and displayed in darkness.
The light is carried and permission to speak His words into lives given because being practical creates a space for questions. And questions for His name requires “Yes Answers.”
Yes Answers are proactive, they are reaction to problems creating solutions in His name for His name.
A simple. plain, daring Yes can mean what to others?