He looks at me over pizza, the noise of the restaurant hums in the background. “You are so beautiful” his gentle blue eyes find mine. He’s the Pastor I call Husband, the man who slid a ring on my left finger and I said ‘forever’ to. The babe bride all of twenty when vows were exchanged and eternal promises given. Hindsight suggests that youthfulness didn’t truly comprehend the seriousness of the sacred oaths made that Spring day in October.
I look back and cradle our third child. I break the glance blushing not knowing how to receive his words. Can’t he see the woman sitting opposite him is covered in baby vomit, hair frizzy from snow’s residue and the smile lines deepening around sleep deprived eyes. That over the eleven years his bride has changed, grown into a woman making costly mistakes along the way. Mistakes which have shaken a man to the core, brought him to his knees, seeking, forgiving, counting the cost of radical, sacrificial love that becomes a choice rather than an emotion. Love like fluid, flowing with the tide of life, washing, nourishing sustaining the fragile girl who fell in love as a teenager. A girl who once shied from intimate love incase she was truly known, seen, crevices in the heart sheltering parts that could undo her if exposed. He’s taught me, the Pastor I call Husband that love is fearless. That its wild and can leave you feeling upside down, that it teaches you the unexpectant.
There is no fear in love.
Perfect love drives out fear, overlooks the ugly and pardons wrongdoing. It chases beauty until the story changes. The path forks into a direction that only few dare to walk. A love that lasts and is built on a solid foundation remains after the earth shakes. When two people entangled in promises dig, search, relentlessly pursue, finding answers to overcome any obstacles.
Fearless love is worth fighting for…
The man who came from Heaven thought so. His incredible love drove him to a bloodied cross teaching me that,
Fearless love is audacious and battles war,
Fearless love forgives and truly forgets,
Fearless love stills the tongue and forms words with kindness,
Fearless love is gentle and tender,
Fearless love, is not for the faint hearted and is successful when drawing from the one who created it. We love each other because Christ first loved us.